nerdgasrnz:

mosteamybeats:

lilaira:

dreamdaddycentral:

sky williams on twitter

THE ALCOHOLIC IS MINE Y’ALL CAN GTFO

I’ll take ‘Asian nigga with a baby’ for 300, Sky.

[Captions]

A’ight look, let me get something fucking straight with you-
(mumbles, amused) well, not straight, but…
(resumes normal volume) Let me get something gay with you-
Y’all must be so excited to play this brand new game with all these daddies

(panning shot of the main art of “Dream Daddy”) Yaaaaaaaaas!

But let me make one thing clear: this is the closest thing I will ever have to a happy, stable relationship! So if I find out that you are cupcaking with this ginger nigga, I swear!!!

(closeup of Brian Harding from the game) This is mine. THIS.

(pans to Robert Small) Go ahead, take ya Alcoholic Nigga, I don’t care!

(pans to Damien Bloodmarck) Naw, y’all can have the metrosexual Professor Snape…

(pans to Craig Cahn) And look, you’re gonna homewreck!!! (zooms in on his baby daughter) You don’t even care!!! What!!?!?!?!

(pans to Joseph Christiansen) This nigga doesn’t even know how to wink!!! That eye isn’t supposed to be relaxed-closed, it’s supposed to be forced-closed! It just looks like you’re injured!

(slow pan from Matt Sella’s body to his face while “Careless Whisper” by George Michael plays in the background) Wow.
(Music stops) SIKE, NO!!! Look! He’s cleaning his glasses with a cloth that’s not even consistent in color! And look at the shadow!!! (referring to the shadow cast by the glasses and his palm) It doesn’t even show the cloth! (goes to Matt’s face again) Demons!!!

(pans to Hugo Vega) This nigga deadass looks like my Uncle Ron, which is my only hangup… I can’t fuck my uncle you know, like that’s just… that’s reasonable.

(camera returns to Brian, with the speaker talking in a coy, flattered voice) Oh hey! *giggles* What’s up? *giggles more* He’s… *keeps giggling*

So go on! Select your character!
[”I wanna take you for a ride” (which is, hilariously enough, character select music) from “Marvel vs Capcom 2″ begins playing]

(Robert) Alcoholic!
(Damien) Metrosexual Snape!
(Craig) Asian nigga with a baby!
(Joseph) White privilege!
(Matt, while imitating Lúcio from “Overwatch”) “It’s time to heal up!”
(Hugo) Uncle Ron!
(Brian) And- [music stops] No!!!
No!!!
Locked character!!!
No!!! No.
Stop it!