woke-up-on-derse:

sometimes i forget that you can beat skyrim. like, there’s an ending?? you don’t keep making enchanted jewelry for your followers forever??? ive completely lost the plot. im a soup witch now

diosdaughter:

My roommates and I messed up some iron-on transfer instructions and now…

vriskerly-actions:

The Signs as Deleted Wikipedia Pages

Aires: Towns with Zombie Problems

Taurus: List of fictional characters who lack bravery

Gemini: Have you tried switching it off and then switching it back on again?

Cancer: International caps lock day

Leo: List of things the cat dragged in

Virgo: Vampire State Building

Libra: Making Wikipedia more accessible to the blind

Scorpio: Bad B*tch Club

Sagittarius: Equus (play) as metaphor for horse and man

Capricorn: Insane Clown Posse ( ICP) Gay / Homosexual Controversy Explained

Aquarius: Gay seahorses

Pisces: Spoilt rich kid

griffinmcelroyspisskink:

turing-tested:

my favorite thing is when you pick up an animal and you look them in the eyes and you can tell nothings going on behind them. you look at them and theres just elevator music. stupid animals really are like the fucking best, the lights are on but no one is home

that also happens when u pick me up and look into my eyes

shobogan:

iconuk01:

tredlocity:

Clark Kent is not a coward, he just hates Superman. The reason he runs off every time disaster occurs is cause he knows Superman will be there soon and he can’t stand the guy.

Oh lord, the idea of a running gag of Clark having to come up with more and more elaborate reasons to hate the most beloved guy on Earth would be comedy gold.

“I loaned him thirty four bucks three weeks ago and he STILL hasn’t paid me back”

“I saw him littering once”

“He’s friends with an asshole like Batman!”

“We’re not friends anymore AND HE KNOWS WHY!”

“HE KEEPS HITTING ON MY WIFE”