regret and grief are very much living things

nolofucker:

the thing about chronic illness, or mine anyway, is that i dont hink you ever stop mourning the life you lost.

like its not always at the forefront of your mind but its always there, and you are constantly reminded of it. like every time i see something i find fun or interesting, it is immediately followed by the fact that it is another thing i can’t do.

like the list almost only grows longer. every time i see sports on tv, or any event that seems intersting that i want to go to, when i see people go hiking. going to a party, getting an education.

i am connately surrounded by the things i can’t do and its honestly so overwhelming. its really hard to try and look at the things i can do, and the list is so much shorter.

and idk i just really want people to recognize how fucking hard it is to live with a chronic illness and i feel generally we deserve a lot more recognition.

like do you have any idea how nice it would be if i could introduce myself to someone and tell them i have ME and not have to explain it all to them? and not tell them my whole life story? and not explain every single symptom?

especially with illnesses like ME/CFS that aren’t even recognized as an actual illness in some countries (me/cfs, what i have, is categorized as a mental illness in denmark, where i live)

i dont know where i am going with this but i i just… want people to acknowledge the struggle and the pain i am in without me having to explain it.

i dont know if other people with chronic illnesses feel the same but these are some of the things i really struggle with

(it ok to reblog this)